Continuation of Our Story...

I wrote a post in March about the beginning of a new journey for me...and for us as a family. You can read about it here. I've had lots of questions recently from people new to our life that want to hear about how we got here. So I thought I'd write a Part Two.

I need to back up at this point all the way to 2004. Our church had a Sacred Gathering early that year. We fasted for 3 days and met each night for 4 nights for prayer. It was an amazing time in the history of our church....one that is still talked about. One night, for a reason I really can't recall, Rick attended the prayer meeting without me. As he gathered in a small group of about 4 people to pray, he felt God was leading him to missions, but he didn't know in what way. He told his small group this and they all prayed. Immediately following that prayer, our associate pastor Kyle stood up and said he felt God prompting him that there may be some there feeling called to missions and he wanted those people to have the opportunity to come forward and pray. Rick was one of 3 or 4 people, I think, that went forward.

Rick came home that night on cloud nine. I remember it so clearly. He was so excited to tell me about God's calling for him. And I remember my reaction, too. I said something like, oh, that's so great, honey. You just go on all the mission trips you want.

I didn't have a clue.

And Rick did just that. He went to Brazil for the first time that year, and subsequently, about 4 more times in the next couple of years. In 2004, Rick was still a stay-at-home dad. But in 2005, he went back to work full time. One of the "conditions" he stipulated to his employer was that he had to have off at least 10 days a year for mission work....even if that meant taking the time without pay. He was that serious. And he was pretty serious about Brazil, too. The first few trips, he came home and was pretty convinced it was a place he could live and minister. I think I even remember some talk about what would I think about moving down there. But I wasn't having much of that kind of talk. And all along the way, there were people praying....probably people I wasn't even aware were praying. I remember a few times seeing Kyle in the hall and he would just smile and pat me on the back and say, "I'm praying for you guys." And I would smile back and secretly say to myself, "You just keep on praying, Kyle, because I'm not called and I'm not leaving Smyrna." At some point in there, I kind of fretted over it because Rick felt so strongly about his calling. But there were very wise people walking along side us that would tell me not to worry about anything, God would never just call one in a marriage. He'll always call you both. So that pretty much settled things for me. I didn't have anything to worry about because God didn't call me and I was convinced...or at least I thought I was convinced at the time...He wasn't going to.

The next little thing up God's big sleeve, though, was calling our best friends to full-time service in Southeast Asia. Boy, did that kind of knock me for a loop. As I walked that road of preparation with my best friend, God was little by little changing my heart. I didn't even realize it at the time....but I look back and can see it so clearly. He had changed my heart so drastically...and right under my nose!!! I think that's why I was so upset when I first heard His voice about Africa. Somewhere deep inside I knew He was calling us to go. But that day in the conference room began about a year long struggle, internally within me and also with God, about what He was saying.

Along the way, God was also changing Rick's heart little by little from Brazil to Africa. I didn't even really know this at the time. We had pretty much stopped talking about missions. I think he knew God had to get my attention and he was going to stop trying to. Even as we made plans to go to West Africa for the first time last year, we never really talked about God's leading on our life. Honestly, I was scared to death to talk about it at all....with anyone. Talking about it would somehow make it more real, and I was still fighting the inevitable.

So it wasn't until we actually got on the African soil in January of this year that all of the pieces began to click for me. And I was still scared, but there was something inside me that knew I was coming quickly to a point...a point of really understanding the call. And I could no longer deny it. I remember sitting in the truck with Becca waiting for our paperwork at the border crossing, looking out the window, and saying to her...with lots of tears, "How am I going to bring my boys to this kind of life? I just don't know if I can do it." Boy, was I so scared! But something our field partner said to us on that last night has stuck with me. He said, "If God has called you, that means He is calling your children, too. Whatever your plans are for their lives, God has bigger plans." And we fully believe part of God's plan for our boys is West Africa. We have tremendous peace about that now.

And today, I know for sure that I can't do it...not by myself anyway. Only with God, through His grace, do I know that we will manage...dare I say, thrive. I am trusting Him so much more these days than I was a year ago. I wait with great anticipation for the adventures that are in store for us. I long to see a great movement of God begin in our people group. We think about it all the time. We are both so honored and humbled that God would ask us to join Him there.

We returned from that initial trip in January acutely aware of our next step. It only took us about a week of intense conversation...lots of nervous excitement as we approached that place of surrender...and more prayer...then we were meeting with our missions pastor and filling him in....and downloading forms to start our paperwork process. It's been a whirlwind since then. But we finally received our official letter of acceptance for service last week. We are now in the process of selling the house and, hopefully, by next summer we will begin our new life in West Africa.

Wow! What a difference a year can make....in hearts...in circumstances...in life!